Five Things That Drive Me Crazy... By Invitation Only

Five Things That Drive Me Crazy!!

Even though I’m a wee bit late, I’m so delighted to be participating in sweet Marsha’s Splenderosa monthly, By Invitation Only.  The topic this month is fun and, as always, generated a lot of ideas.  So without further ado... here is my own personal list of Five Things That Make Me Crazy.  Do tell me if any are familiar to you.  It can’t be just me.  Can it? 

1.  Stickers on Fruit

They are on every banana, every orange. 

Every grapefruit, every pear.  

These ubiquitous little blue stickers! 

I don’t think one has to have a design background to both love the look of a colourful bowl of fresh fruit sitting on the sideboard and abhor these sticky, vexatious blights on each and every one.

  Do they really need to be on every one?  Really? 

 And yes, I pull each and every one off.  

They drive me crazy.  Seriously.

2.  Guests Who Arrive Early To Dinner Parties

The flowers are arranged and the stickers are off the fruit.  Dinner is cooking; the music is set.  I have forty-five minutes to freshen my lipstick and check my hair; forty-five minutes to sit in the quiet and collect my thoughts and ... then... oh, it can’t be!  A knock at the door! 

 “Oh, sorry we’re a bit early.  We knew you wouldn’t mind!”

Well, guess what?  Sometimes I do mind! 

Five minutes I can handle; thirty or forty-five, I’d rather not, thanks.

  I’ve toyed with the idea of answering the door in my underwear when this happens because, yes, it drives me crazy! 

3. The Over, and Improper, Usage of the Word, “Awesome”

There was a day when it was used to describe the staggering bulk of Ben Nevis; when it was the only word appropriate for the face of a lion.  But these days this wonderful word is forced to slum as a description of every triviality from the perfect parking spot to a well-done hamburger.  It drives me crazy!  And don’t even get me started on the word, “like”.

4.  Designing Rooms To Look Like Hotel Lobbies

I recently had the good fortune to meet the uber-designer, Nina Campbell, and was utterly thrilled to hear her say how much she, like me, detests the current trend in design of creating rooms that resemble hotels.  Sleek, cool, always neutral.  Straight-lined and contemporary, with nary a personal object or whimsicality to be found.  Rooms that appear more suited to a business meeting that to curling up with a good book and a furry dog.  Happily, and I got this straight from Nina herself, this trend is dissipating, with colour and personality on the rise, so perhaps it won’t drive me crazy for too much longer.

(Here’s a photograph of Nina and me.

  And yes, having it turn out with my blasted eyes closed drives me crazy, too.)

5.  The Marketing of Beauty Products as “Anti-Aging”

Talk about setting women up to feel badly about themselves!  Who amongst us can really be “anti” aging?  We are all doing it, whether we’re twenty-five or fifty-five.  And guess what?  Aging is not a disease, it’s a privilege.  Yes, I love my creams and potions but I want to believe they make me look my best, not that they are stopping me from aging.  Because when we stop aging, we cease to exist.  You guessed it... this drives me crazy.  How about you?

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So there you have it.  Five things that drive me crazy.  Hardly a complete list, mind you.  I didn’t even get to mention when the car window rolls up and catches my hair.  Or American Idol. Or commercials in movies!  Whatever happened to cartoons??  Or when the Sunday edition of New York Times arrives and is missing the book review section and I call to report it but it’s too late to deliver another copy and the lady offers to credit my account but I don’t want my account credited I want the dad gum book review section! 

Or... guess I should stop now.

Thanks Marsha!  It was fun!