Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Who We Are


Who We Are

There are handfuls of inspirational gems liberally scattered throughout every scene of the new film, I Am Love.  They are free for the taking and I walked out of the theatre with my mind brimming over with gleaming jewels of orange and gold.  As I turn them over and over, this way and that, they continue to impart wisdom and beauty even now, days after I gathered them up off the screen.
 In the movie, the main character states that although she was born in Russia, when she moved to Italy, she “ceased to be Russian”.  Bestowed with a new name by her Italian husband, she could no longer even recall her given name and, with no one from her past remaining in her life, she simply forgot who she once was, an untenable state of being and one doomed to evanesce under her feet like beach sand.

I had occasion to think about that character quite a lot these past few days.  When some old friends lost everything in the Nashville floods of May, The Songwriter came up with the idea to put together a concert for them.  It was as though he lit a fire on a mountaintop, a blazing beacon that was seen and answered by the friends of our youth from their respective hideouts all over the country. This collection of sweetly familiar faces descended on Nashville this week, resulting in a reunion of people who had not been in the same room together in several decades.

Years melted away in the hot July sun to the soundtrack of laughter and memory. I heard my name rearranged to "Pammy", something that never happens except with these few people.  Looking in their eyes, I could see my own reflection, and was struck by the realization that the person I once was continues to accompany me even after all these years.
 I thought about that Russian character in the movie, lost to herself in Italy, and I understood empirically how important are those touchstones that beckon us to our former selves.  We all change and evolve, at least hopefully so - we wrinkle and soften, lose some and gain some - and the days flash by like a lightning strike.  It is immensely comforting to all do it together.  Aging leaves none of us behind; we are all sailing the same sea.  What a gift it is to stand in the light of an old friend's gaze and feel the wonder of stopping, even reversing, time - for at least a few days. 
A stopped clock that presents us with time to remember - time to know - that who we were remains who we are.

“Let it go my love my truest,
Let it sail on silver wings
Life’s a twinkling that’s for certain,
But it’s such a fine thing
There’s a gathering of spirits
There’s a festival of friends
And we’ll take up where we left off
When we all meet again.”

 From the song, A Gathering of Spirits, by Carrie Newcomer

39 comments:

  1. A wonderful and perceptive observation Pamela...xv

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  2. I leave this post feeling uplifted. Thank you, Pamela.

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  3. Dear Pamela, An inspirational post. In times of crisis, how reassuring that there are often people, such as both you and Songwriter, who take action to address the situation. Your gathering sounds to have been a most memorable occasion and will, I am sure, stay as a joyful memory for all time.

    For my own part, I am always nervous of reunions of any kind and rarely attend them. Unlike you, I tend to find that people belong to certain times and places and do not, for me at least, transport well across the years.

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  4. What thoughts and memories this post summoned up. Both friends and music are very powerful things. Your friend is blessed to have you.
    Gosh and I was looking at the Beatles photo above and it brought memories flooding back.
    A pat for Edward and Apple.

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  5. How beautiful. How true. What a beautiful beacon of a gesture. For your friends...for yourself.

    Thank you!

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  6. Such a lovely post, you really made me think. We are all the sum of our past encounters. How wonderful that those two people had all those true friends to turn to when they were needed, even after a lot of living and years had passed.

    Your visit and comment was so welcome, thank you dearly. Migraines are sheer agony...not just 'a headache'!

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  7. Thank you for such a touching post. Living "overseas" has left me feeling rootless at times. Thanks for the reminder that the web still exists. ~Susan

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  8. It was good to read ! Thanks !!

    xo
    Anci

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  9. Oh my heavens, what a chord you struck in me; you are a most gifted and amazing writer and individual.

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  10. And finally, I am able to attend a family reunion in WI this month after years of trying. Will be interesting as well as astonishing to see the cousins I grew up visiting grown up themselves - or perhaps not! That Beatles photo - what struck me was how nice to see George Harrison smiling; I don't recall seeing him smile much...thanks again.

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  11. Thank you my dearest Pammy...its so good to take time and remember..we are in a difficult age..its good to "see"yourself in the eyes of old friends.

    Stay warm and stay happy..
    xoxo T.D

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  12. Just Loved this post, pamela...and some friends from very long ago will be visiting this month and I'll remember your words.

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  13. I definitely want to see that film, but keep missing it when its showing!

    How nice to hold a concert for your friends..

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  14. The friends I had as a child have sailed upon different seas, and when we converge we barely know one another. Sad, isn't it? Yet when I go home to the place where I was born and raised, there is a memory of it that comes to the surface, and it's a good thing.
    How special a person is The Songwriter, using the power of his music to heal and bring people together. Beautiful post.

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  15. How did you know that our friends from some 35 years ago just left our home a few hours ago? We started out as teachers together, married, and remained good friends all these years, even though miles and miles and miles away. How did you know, Pamela? I sit here tearful at your touching post, sad to see them go away again, moved by your words, and know that I will borrow the words from the song from your post.

    Now, I must begin getting ready for a family reunion here in several weeks. Life is grand, as is your post.

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  16. so dear so true.......thx for being u

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  17. "What a gift it is to stand in the light of an old friend's gaze and feel the wonder of stopping, even reversing, time - for at least a few days."

    That pretty much sums up this entire post, beautifully sung. I've been there, too, and felt the wonder of my old self, almost forgotten, easily brought to the fore.

    Was this the Village Chapel night for the Farrell's? No matter, what the Songwriter did was a gift of love, and I, as one who witnessed and was affected (minimally) by the Nashville flood, thank y'all both.

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  18. Great post Pamela, what wonderful friends you are to support them in such a special way.

    I watched the movie on the plane ride home and like you am still thinking about it. It touches you on so many levels, as a mother, as a wife and as a woman who at times can feel displaced in another land. Superbly acted, beautiful setting....dare I watch it again?

    Best wishes for a wonderful week...postcard on it's merry little way..

    Jeanne xx

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  19. It's very true that it's good to age together with friends who somehow still look exactly as they did when we all were young. It's true of family too, I have an uncle and aunt who are 80 and 76 now but in my head they remain in their mid twenties, I never think of them as old. How wonderful for the couple who lost everything to know that the one really important thing that remains is the loyal friendships made in their youth.

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  20. What a wonderful post Pamela..
    I haven't heard of the movie but understand the feeling of being adrift.. It is those old relationships that keep us grounded.. and remind us of our youth. Sounds like you had a Big Chill adventure.. Take care.. and thanks for the visit.. my internet is somewhat unreliable since the move hence little blogging or visits.. xxx Julie

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  21. Tremendous - revives faith in human nature. Superb post.

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  22. "and the days flash by like a lightning strike."...I find this to be so so true...

    What a wonderful gift to your friends in need and then to see that you received a gift too:)
    xo

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  23. Beautifully written and so heart-warming Pamela.

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  24. Dear Pamela,
    Just by glancing at my sidebar at your picture, I was taken back and reminded of my life in the '60's and of when I saw the Beatles....TWICE !! They were so important to me from the age of 12 !! I knew that it was them, immediately. I think that I have Beatle radar !! I was saying to a friend today that life is a series of memories. That is what it is and the present is the time to make more.
    A wonderful thing for The Songwriter to do and for you both to bring back some memories of your own. XXXX

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  25. A photograph of some of my favorite people! Can you imagine sitting around that table with them!! Good on ya and Songwriter for your lovely fundraiser for your friends...must have been a wonderful day..

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  26. beautiful words & beautiful gestures too.

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  27. Beautiful post. You've set me to thinking about who I was and who I've become.

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  28. Yet another story reminding us how, as we move through life, our longtime friends are important and grounding. Although few blood relatives remain in England, I have my most dear friends who draw me back to my roots, to childhood games and school classrooms, to wonderful memories of my life before America........and so I continue to return and will as long as am able. That earlier life is 'who I am' and I believe one can still go home.

    I loved this post. What the Songwriter did for your friends is an inspiration to us all who come through life's disasters unscathed.......but need to be spurred on to help others less fortunate.

    Hope you and Edward are having some cooler days by now!

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  29. In truth, we cannot be other than who we are. Some might try but the 'real' person will always be there even if they need to be reminded! You and The Songwriter did a great thing for your friends.

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  30. This is so wonderful, Pamela. I love any remembrance of my former self.

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  31. Good for you Pammy, and the songwriter of course!

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  32. Beautiful post Pamela, and love it that friends and music brought you all together.
    Sounds like a lovely time, and thanks for sharing.

    Hugs
    Carolyn

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  33. Oh my heart! What a wonderful and moving paean to friendship and the passage of time, Pamela!

    I was transported to some point in my own future as I read. Thank you

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  34. So beautiful and positive..your have helped me feel really good, thankyou xxxxx
    Hugs Lynn xxx

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  35. Dear Pamela and sweet Edward, thank you for your good wishes and concern. It is so good to be back and reading and enjoying your blog. I was a little surprised, or am I mistaken? that you had not read Jane Eyre before. It is one of my stand byes for any season. Glad you too enjoy le bon Hercule and Miss Marple. Do you get to see the Midsummer Murders series in the US? I adore the countryside and chief inspector Barnaby and have lately discovered the books they were based on which in some ways are even better than the series.

    I hug you in spirit and solemnly shake Edward by the paw.

    Arija

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  36. What a gorgeous post and so well said. About 14 years ago, I reconnected with a childhood friend (who is now my dentist in NYC!). We had lost touch when we went to college so we knew each other as children and then as adults. He remains one of my most treasured friends as we serve as reminders for each other of both who we are today and where we've come from. Throughout our lives, we have scattered those "friends of the heart" - people we can just pick up the conversation where we left off, even if that was years or even decades ago. You're so right - they are important touchstones as the path unwinds before us.

    So glad to find your blog!

    Best,

    Jane (and Petey)

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  37. I haven’t heard of this movie, but it sounds interesting. What a wonderful way to help your friends! I do enjoy being with my old friends too.

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  38. We were having lunch with old friends last week - one of us retired the others, including me, coming to that point in life very soon - yet as we chatted about the same things we always do, books, films, politics, places it was as if all those years had stood still for a while.

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  39. I so loved this post Pamela. My favorite lines you wrote were, "I could see my own reflection, and was struck by the realization that the person I once was continues to accompany me even after all these years". It rings true that real friends are those that you can pick-up where you left off. No matter how many years have passed. Bravo to your songwriter for putting together a concert to help those in need. It sounds like you all reaped much joy from this event?

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I love to read your comments! Each and every one! Though I'm always reading your comments, I may not respond in the comment section. If you want to write me directly, you may do so at pamela@pamelaterry.net. Thank you for reading!